You Cannot Fail In Your Personal Growth (But You Can Be Defeated By Constantly Greater Things)

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An interesting post on failure in business at the Instigator blog got me thinking about the subject of failure in relation to personal growth.

We often hear of the importance of failure in business. We’re told that if we don’t have some failures in our business we’re probably not stretching or trying enough new things. And when we do fail, we’re quickly reminded of all the great successes that were preceded by equally impressive failures.

I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.

Thomas Edison

Likewise, in sports, failure is recognized as an acceptable, if not enjoyable part of the terrain. The New England Patriots aside, going undefeated is a goal that draws teams towards greatness even while every team-member recognizes the nearly impossible nature of the goal.

The best business leaders and coaches know that the big winners will be those who are willing to innovate, to try new things. Some will work. Some will fail. But as long as they learn from the failures, they know they will continue to move forward and grow.

Why then, is it so much more difficult to accept failure in the personal growth arena?

How many times have you heard (or spoken) something along the lines of:

Why can’t I stop procrastinating?
I’m so frustrated that I can’t lose these last 10 pounds.
Why does – insert person’s name here – still trigger me after so many years?
I wish I could be more consistent with my exercise.
Why can’t I stick to a budget?

Each of these statements implicitly denies the powerful opportunities to learn from these situations. If we could be more accepting of our personal growth failures life would flow so much more gracefully.

Instant gratification has no place in personal growth work. Too often we want the growth process to be quick, easy and fun. It certainly can be all of those things. But when the process is more difficult and the personal growth road gets a bit bumpy it’s very easy to think that we have failed.

In truth, we can’t fail at our personal growth. Personal growth is about experience, not winning.

The only way to fail at personal growth is to stop trying! If we shut ourselves down to the experiences that cause us to grow, then we have failed.

Failure is not falling down but refusing to get up.

Chinese Proverb

Even if it takes a lifetime to transform one habit, as long as we are actively engaged in the process of personal growth we are being successful!Ranier Maria Rilke wrote a poem about Jacob wrestling the Angel. In our personal growth the Angel we wrestle could be the procrastination, the last 10-pounds, the exercise.

Even if we do not “win” in this struggle, the decisive defeat keeps us growing.

The Man Watching

I can tell by the way the trees beat, after
so many dull days, on my worried windowpanes
that a storm is coming,
and I hear the far-off fields say things
I can’t bear without a friend,
I can’t love without a sister.

The storm, the shifter of shapes, drives on
across the woods and across time,
and the world looks as if it had no age:
the landscape, like a line in the psalm book,
is seriousness and weight and eternity.

What we choose to fight is so tiny!
What fights with us is so great!
If only we would let ourselves be dominated
as things do by some immense storm,
we would become strong too, and not need names.

When we win it’s with small things,
and the triumph itself makes us small.
What is extraordinary and eternal
does not want to be bent by us.
I mean the Angel who appeared
to the wrestlers of the Old Testament:
when the wrestlers’ sinews
grew long like metal strings,
he felt them under his fingers
like chords of deep music.

Whoever was beaten by this Angel
(who often simply declined the fight)
went away proud and strengthened
and great from that harsh hand,
that kneaded him as if to change his shape.
Winning does not tempt that man.
This is how he grows: by being defeated, decisively
by constantly greater beings.

Rainer Maria Rilke
Translated by Robert Bly

So the next time you fail, consider the possibility that you were wrestling with an Angel!

Posted by Edward Mills | Filed Under Inspiration, Personal Growth 

Learn To Draw From A Master Teacher

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Did you watch the video of Jacque Fresco I posted last week? It’s definitely worth the 15-minutes.

But even if you missed that video, if you’ve ever been interested in learning how to draw you’ll want to check this out! Mark Joyner has brought his expertise in powerful online learning environments and partnered with the master art teacher, Jacque Fresco, to create a truly unparalleled opportunity to learn how to draw.

And for the next 48-hours you can save $200 on this program. Go check it out now:

Simpleology Great Teachers Series.

I remember how many of my blogging friends said they would learn to draw or paint when I posed the question “what would you do with an extra 36-hours a week.” Here’s your chance!

At least go check out the program’s website. I swear I learned more about drawing from that page than I did in all of the college level art courses I took. (Of course that could be due to external factors associated with college-age behavior and the destruction of many brain cells!)

Here’s that link again: Simpleology Great Teachers Series.

Posted by Edward Mills | Filed Under Personal Growth, Simpleology 

Personal Growth Resource Roundup #6

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With the holiday and our travels I’ve taken a couple of weeks off from the Personal Growth Resource Roundups. But this week it’s back, and better than ever.

I’ve got to begin with three non-blog resources that have the potential to dramatically accelerate your personal growth.

First, Zoe Routh, who some of you might know from the Law of Attraction for Inspired Living blog, has recently released a truly amazing product, The Law of Attraction Superhighway. It’s a package of interviews with 10 of the top Law of Attraction coaches in the world. Some of the incredible coaches interviewed include Drew Rozell, Eva Gregory and Anisa Aven.

I would have no problem recommending this product to you, but the fact that I’m one of the coaches that Zoe interviewed makes it a no-brainer.

Add in the bonuses worth over $1000 and you’ve got a winning package!

Make sure you get your copy of the Law of Attraction Superhighway before the end of the year. The price goes up by $50 in January!

Next up is the Personal Development Partners site. I’ve talked about this before. And as the holiday season moves into full-swing, it’s a great time to connect with other personal growth junkies… er, people.

The holidays can be a stressful time and there’s no better way to beat the stress than to find a partner for accountability, support and encouragement. And PDP is one of the best places to find that person.

And as we head into the new year, you’ll definitely want to partner up with someone to vision and act your way into your best year ever!

And Personal Development Partners is the place to be.

And finally, there’s Rich Schefren’s Attention Age Doctrine Part 2. Yes, this falls into the category of business growth, but because, as an entrepreneur, I don’t separate personal and business growth, I have found gotten powerful personal insights from this Doctrine that will improve my life far beyond the realm of business!

I’ve been a fan of Rich Schefren’s since I discovered his Internet Business Manifesto over a year ago. Now, here’s the thing: this Manifesto was not another ploy from some Internet Marketing guy. It was the real deal. Rich gave it all away in the Manifesto. The information truly blew me away and made me make some radical changes to the way I approach my business!

And with his Attention Age Doctrine, he’s gone even further! We hear the term “Information Overload” quite a bit. But I have not seen anyway provide a better look at how to beat it, both from a consumer perspective and from a business owner perspective.

The Doctrine and the Manifesto are both free so go get them now!

Now let’s move on to a few great personal growth blog posts that I’ve come across in the last week.

First up is a post from Kat Wilder. I can’t remember how I came upon her, but she’s well worth a visit. The post that got me thinking was The Dad Vs. Hubby Smackdown. We all wear multiple hats. I’m a father, husband, business owner, writer, friend, etc., etc. Is it possible to be good at all of them? Can I be a great dad and a great husband? It’s definitely an issue that is up for me right now. So thanks to Kat for putting words to it. If you’ve ever struggled with the balance between two or more of your roles, you’ll want to check it out.

Next, one of my new blogging friends, Agent Sully at Life Learning Today has a wonderful post on Dreaming Big. As we head into the new year, it’s the time to dream and vision and set our course for the coming year. This post should help you do that.

And then there’s Jeannette Maw who had me smiling at my desk when I read in her Thanksgiving Day post on Uncommon Gratitude that she was grateful for the fact that she has “never had a boyfriend’s parole officer stop by on a holiday.”

It’s good to bring lightness to gratitude, and Jeannette has most definitely succeeded!

Well, I think I’ll leave it at that for now. Look for another edition of the Personal Growth Resource Roundup next Saturday.

Posted by Edward Mills | Filed Under Law of Attraction, Personal Growth, business 

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